Book 2 -- Woah!

Miley got up.
"Where are you going?" Lily asked.
"To Oliver."
"What what about the pancakes!" Lily said.
Miley took Lily's wrist and went over to Oliver; Lily with a pancake half-shoved in her mouth.
"Oliver." Miley said.
"Mhm?"
"I have something to tell you."
"You got the best of both worl!-"
"What was that?" Miley called.
"My cell-phone." Oliver said.
"Yello'" Oliver said smoothly.
"Hi mum."
"Only at the beach, god."
"Okay."
"Oliver."
"What?" Oliver said, annoyed.
Meet me at the beach tomorrow. I've got something to show you.

Oliver nodded.
"And don't nod like a chicken."
Lilly added.
Oliver looked bitterly at her, arms folded.
"Ok, see you tomorow then?"
He asked her, checking.
Miley nodded.
"And that's a normal nod.."
Lilly pointed out.
Oliver pushed her gently.
Lilly whispered to Miley,
"Might wanna do it early.. When no one's here. Like.. At 5 AM."
Miley stood on her foot on purpose.
"Owwwwww."
She whined.
"Eh?"
Oliver said, blinking.
"Mosquito."
"Good save."
Miley hissed to her.
"I better go, mum'll be mad at me."
Oliver said, winking at two girls passing by.
He walked off, leaving Jackson smirking at Oliver trying charm.
"Wait ladies, wanna have a day with the Smokin' Oken?"
He disapeared around the corner.
"Amateur."
Jackson muttered to himself.

Miley waved goodbye, and sprang out of bed.
She smiled, bringing her Hannah montana wig out.
She got a incoming call from Oliver.

This better be good.
Seeya at the beach today,

cya. xxx Smoken Oaken

Miley got dressed, into Hannah Montana. She put on her golden sparkly top, cream cardigan, beige trousers and her silver belt. She put on Miley's red ruby lipstick, silver nailpolish, rosy faint blush, sunglasses, gold eyeshadow, eyeliner and mascara; 2 coats.

She walked onto the beach, chewing some black gum with her mouth open.

"Hello Honey." She said.

Oliver had left his unruly hair as it was.
His eyes were barely open, but he had managed to put on some deoderant.
he wore a red short-sleeved shirt that had 'Rock' on it, and black combats. He wore black trainers with white socks.
"What is i-- Hannah?"
He saw Hannah, and he blinked, rubbing at his eyes.
But when he saw the gum, he looked horrified, Oliver was in front of her, pressing his back against the boulder.
All he could see was the black gum.
"Er...I've checked every fan base and..err.... There was nothing about you being a.."
He swallowed hard at this bit.
"Gum chewer."
He managed to say.
You see, Oliver had hated gum.
He detested it, since his grandma had bent over his cot and by accident spat gum in his face.
Oliver shivered at the thought.
"I hate that woman."
He said, finding himself sweaty, with a racing heart and clutching to the rock.
He swallowed.
"Sacrifice, sacrifice."
He repeatedly murmered, breathing heavily.

Hannah smirked.
"Hiya!" She said, chewing more gum.
"If you make me laugh, gum
will explode out of my nose! Wanna see it?"
Hannah insisted.
"No tha-"
"TOO LATE!"
Hannah blew a large bubble, ending up all over Oliver's face.
"How. Do. You. Like. Me. Nowww." Hannah said slowly and sternly.

Oliver scratched it off his face.
"I still love you!"
He burst out, standing up quickly and dusting himself off.
"I'll sacrafice."
He mumbled, picking out bits of gum of his hair.
Oliver narrowed his eyes as he looked at Hannah.
Wow..She was acting as strange as Miley and Lilly were. And that's a first.
He sighed.

Hannah groaned.
"Listen, bub. You and Hannah Montana shall
NEVER be together. You hear me? Okay? Good!"
Hannah said, taking off her sunglasses and spitting out her gum.
"why?" Oliver asked.
"Because." Hannah paused.
She put her hand to her wig.
"I'm Hannah montana." Hannah said.
Hannah pulled off her wig, showing Miley with dark make-up on.

Oliver's eyes widened twice their size from under his brown fringe, mouth slightly open.
He was left without words.
"Oliver... Uhh.. Oliver."
Miley said, waving a hand in front of his face.
"Speak to me boy!"
She said, continuing to frantically wave.
But he fell backwards, fainting dead away.
She shock was just too much for him to handle.

Miley stood there, sitting ontop of the rock.
Well, he handeled that well.
I can go back to school now. Umm. Yaaay? Urgh.

Oliver opened his eyes, blinking, seeing Miley's shoes close to his face.
"Huh..?"
He blinked, sitting up while moving her feet.
He had forgotten, but he mulled over his mind, trying to remember why he fainted.

After a few minutes of gasping, unable to get words out, he finally managed to.
"Y..You're.Hannah Montana?"
he asked her.
Miley nodded, looking down at him.
Oliver moaned, putting his hands over his face.
"Aw man.. And you were there when I made out with you?"
Miley blushed.
"Err. Yeah."
She said.
Oliver moaned, and lay back.
"Don't wake me up until you've forgotten."
He clsoed his eyes, scratching his pan=flat stomach.

"I tried to get you to like me so you wouldn't like me.
I guess it back fired. Soo..
Want to get a hot dog and a soda?" Miley asked, trying to forget
about it. Already.
"Want to try it?" Oliver asked.
"Umm.. Okay.." Miley blushed.
They kissed each-other but then pulled away.
"Anything?" Miley asked.
"Nope. It was arkward though." Oliver replied.
They walked on the beach with each-other
biting into their hot-dogs.

Oliver smirked and walked on the way home with Miley, keeping his head close to hers so he could whisper as they walked, though he had to bend slightly to reach her height.
"So... I'm the only one who didn't know? Is that why you and Lilly have been acting so wierd?"
Miley nodded.
"And has she been going to your concerts?"
He asked.
Miley realised he didn't seem to be taking all this to offence. He was wanting information.
"Yeah.. Back-stage though, where you couldn't see her."
She grinned.
Oliver chuckled.
"Does she need a disguise?"
He asked.
"Yeah, she's Lola Luftnagle."
She replied in a bored fashion.
"Cool. I'm..Really sorry for acting so bad and like I loved you.. I may never be able to love another popstar again, in case it turns out to be Amber or Ashley in disguise."
Miley laughed.
"Anyway.. You must love the attention."
He said, eyes shining and misty as he thought.
Miley laughed hollow.
"Yeah, and being chased, being crowded around and not able to breath sometimes. But..I guess I do like the attention.. I love the little kids with big eyes asking for an autograph, they're so cute. Then there's the hott boys.."
She sighed, Oliver nudged her in the ribs with his elbow in order to stop her from leaving the planet mentally.
"Anyway. This is where I leave you. See you tomorow."
He said, hugging her awkwardly.
"Yeah.. Bye."
Miley replied, wig in hand.
Olive rbegan to walk up the right pavement, as she had to go left, but she suddenly called out,
"WAIT! OLIVER!"
Oliver turned.
"Yeah?"
He asked.
"This won't come between our friendship will it?!"
Oliver shook his head.
"Nah.. See you at school. I'm catching some hours of sleep. But I gotta let this heal."
He pointed to his hand, grinning his Oliver grin.
"See you."
He walked a brisk walk, then set off at a run at hearing his mother's voice distantly.

Miley sighed.
"Well, that's over and done with." She sighed.
"Hey miles." Lily smirked.
Lily looked at Miley.
"What's up?" Lily asked.
"Well.." Miley began, sitting on a chair that belonged to
Rico's Bar/Shack place.
"Yes?" Lily said, giving Jackson $10 for some fries and ketchup to share with Miley.
"Thanks." Miley smiled, starting to eat her fries.
Miley paused, looking both ways to see
if anyone was there. She whispered to Lily,
"I told him I was Hannah Montana." Miley paused,
thinking about the kiss.
"I think i'm going to be sick."
"How did he take it?" Lily said.
"He fainted." Miley said causually.
"Okay!" Lily said. "As long as I have my beloved fries!" Lily
said, eating a mouth-full of fries.

Oliver walked into the house, realising his mum had already gone, probably to work, and also to tell them of his 'abduction'.
He yawned.
"I'm now officially Smokin' Oken."
He said, smirking.
"Maybe I'll help Sizzlin' Stuwart with his--"
Oliver sighed and rolled his eyes, hearing a noise in the kitchen cereal cupboard, only small for rats..aaaaand.
"Rico!"
Oliver yelled.
"Get out my house!"
He pulled him out by his collar.
"I need that recipe, and I thought a bubblebrain like you would give it to me. If I disguise as... A RAT!!! MUWAAHAHAHAHA!"
OLiver held Rico at arm's length as if Rico was a pair of rancid dirty socks.
"OUt we go."
Oliver said, grinning as he opened the front door and walked down the path.
He smiled at his neighbor, who was looking out her window, raising one eyebrow.
"Just taking the trash out ma'am."
She still stared as he opened the bin-lid with the oversized mouse in his hand and dropped it in, slamming the lid over it loudly.
"This isn't over yet, Oliver, I know where you live! I know everything about you. I'll hold something over you. You'll see, you'll see!"
Oliver walked back in, Rico muttering to himself.
He got into the house, dusting his hands off.
"Job well done by Smokin' Oken."
He grinned and walked over to his mum's blue police phone.
She'd never know if he used it for a single friend call.
He dialed in the Suwart's phone number and waited.
"Yes Oliver?"
Was the sound of Robbie-Ray speaking.
"Sorry to bother you Mr Stuwart."
Began Oliver minding his manners.
"Is Jackson in?"
He asked.
Robbie-Ray called for Jackson.
But after a few minutes, he said,
"No.. I think he's down at Rico's shack. Making his own shack.. When will he ever learn?"
Oliver forced a laugh.
"You're right Mr Stuwart, what WAS he thinking?"
"You're going to join him aren't you?"
"YEs sir."
Oliver quickly hurried.
"See you later."
"See you boy."
Oliver slammed the phone down and ran off to the beach.

Miley was finishing off Lily's fries.
She saw Oliver practicully rush onto the beach.
"Hey Oliver." Miley said.
"Hi Oliver." Lily smiled.
"Hi." He replied.
"Oh, and Oliver your going to need a disguise."
Miley instructed.
"What disguise?" Oliver said, confused.
"You know." Lily said.
Miley grabbed Oliver into a huddle.
"For Hannah montana." Miley whisperered.
"Ya know." Lily added.
"Why would I need a disguise? I'm not famous!"
Oliver pointed out, utterly confused.
"You know..." Lily said again. "I'm Lola."
Oliver smirked.
Miley looked at her watch. "Oh. My gosh!" She said.
"What?" Lily and Oliver said in unision.
"I have a concert I need to go to! You better get a diguise quickly!"
Miley said, running away to get to the concert.
"Well.. I have my vampire outfit." Oliver said,
running back to his house.
"Oh, and don't be late! Meet back here in 1 hour!"
Miley said, grabbing her stuff. Lily went to her house.
In a hours time, all of them were in the limo.
"HOLY MOLY." Lily said.
"Look, it's count Dorkula." Miley joked.
"What? It was short notice." Oliver said,
suddenly hiding himself in his cloak.
As the limo pulled up, the three got out.
"OH MY GOSH!" Lily said,
pointing to a latin guy.
"Not too keen on him." Hannah blurred.
"I aaaam.." Lily smiled.
The man came over. "Hola." He smiled.
"Hhiiiiiiiiii!" Lily blurted out.
"I am looking for a tennis player to replace
my other one. She." He paused. "Broke her two toes and
cannot run." He said sadly. "Could one of
you three help me out?"
"I PUT THE TENNIS IN TENNESEY!" Lily quickly yelled.
"Shush, quieter please." He insisted.
He paused.
"So you can help me out?" He said greatfully.
"Sure!" Lily smiled.
"By the way, what are your names?" He asked.
Oliver had come back in a new gangsta outfit.
"I'm Hannah, this is Lola And this is..." Hannah said, looking at Oliver.
Oliver paused.
"Mike.." He said looking at a microphone stand. "Stand..ley."
He said quickly.
He paused.
"Nice to meet you... Mike." He said.
"So, ready to play?" Lily smiled.
"Yes." The man said, guiding Lola outside.
Lola gave a thumbs-up to Hannah who gave a thumbs-up to her back.
"I thought you said it was a concert." Mike smiled.
"So did I." Hannah said firmly.

Mike blinked.
"Is that armpit hair?"
Hannah asked him.
Mike pretended to look mildly confused, he then whispered to Lola as she passed.
"I thought you said she wouldn't notice."
Lola shrugged and walked off with Tiger (I think that was his name xD)
Mike and Hannah sat down near the back, Oliver was getting into this.
"I'm with Hannah and I'ma playin'."
He started rapping.
"Please don't."
Hannah begged.
"And it's all freakki freakki-- Are you kidding me??"
He asked, as a lady with a big hat sat in front.
"Shutup, they're coming on."
Hannah said, nudging him in the ribs.
"LOok! There's Lola!"
She said excitedly, waving at Lola who waved back madly.
"As I said, I can't SEE!"
Mike hissed.
"Oh fine."
She tapped the lady on the shoulder, the lady turned.
"Do you mind if you could take your hat off, my friend here can't see."
She smiled and nodded, turning back.
She took the red hat off, but it was replaced by an even bigger wig.
Hannah was staring at Lola and Tiger as they got their places, but Mike was having trouble seeing the first serve by Tiger.

"Swap seats with me."
"No."
"Swap seats with me."
"No."
"Swap seats with me." Oliver said through gritted teeth.
"No." Hannah smiled.
Lola threw the ball up into the air, and missed it.
"Guys!" She cried out to Hannah and Mike.
Lola grunted, and batted her ball. She hit it.
"Guys. Just calm down." Lola said slowly.
Mike moaned.
"Aww man!"
He said.
"Please?"
"No."
Mike tried to move some of her hair.
"Awh man! My ring is stuck!" He said,
struggling to pull it out of her hair.
"Argh!" He said, pulling his hand.
"Let me help you." Hannah said, getting up.

Mike struggled, Lola moaned.
"Are those your friends?"
Tiger whispered angrily to Lola, pointing at Hannah and Mike, struggling to pull Mike's hand out of her hair.
"Err.. No."
"Good, because they're SHOWING us up."
Tiger and Lola went back to the game.
Meanwhile.
"Uh oh."
Hannah said, eyes widened.
"What? Your uh-ohs are almost as bad as mine."
Mike hissed, the lady getting annoyed.
"MY ring's stuck."
She hissed to him.
"And your Uh-ohs are worse than anyone's."
Mike moaned.
"Lola! Your serve!"
Called out Tiger.
LOla went running forward, but at the exact same time, the lady's wig came off.
"Noooooooooooooo!"
Tiger yelled as the wig went flying at Lola.
Lola blinked, and was whacked full on in the face.
Mike and Hannah's mouths were open as they climbed to the front, jumping over the side as Lola lay on the floor, unconcious.
"Err.. It's all my fault?"
Tiger looked furious, Hannah looked angry.
"Ya' think?"
Hannah said sarcastically.
Tiger stormed off and Lola woke up to see Mike and Hannah crouching by her.
"You ok?"
"Yeah.. One thing.. UNTANGLE ME FROM THIS NET!"
She shrieked, upset that Tiger had left in a strop and now probably would hate her.

Hannah smiled, untangling Lola from the knot

Mike helped also, and they found themselves laughing it over.
Mike's phone suddenly vibrated.
"Err. Gotta take this one."
He said to Lola and Hannah as he saw the caller I.D was his mum.
He stood up, walking into a more private area.
"Mum?"
He sighed.
"OLIVER! MOVE MOVE MOVE! DInner is on the table!"
"MUM You're on loud speaker!"
He yelled, turning it off as his name was said.
"Ok. I'm coming."
He hissed, ending the call.
Oliver went back to the other two.
"See you, mum needs me home. See you at school."
All three of them hugged and Oliver left.
Gradually the other two left.

Miley was sobbing by her locker, MP3 in hand.
Lilly walked along the hall, backpack on her back, skateboard and helmet under one arm.
Lilly saw Miley and blinked.
"Miley?"
Miley wailed.
"Miley, are you ok?"
She frantically asked.
"Did you see Amber and Ashley?"
She shook her head.
"Did you see your yearbook picture?"
Miley shook her head, but then snapped out of her crying.
"Why? What was wrong with it?"
She asked.
Lilly nervously laughed.
"Just.. It said.. I'm in love with greens!"
Miley took out the earphones.
"And this is what I get for eating healthily!"
She rolled her eyes sky-wards and looked back at LIlly.
"Truscott."
Came a familiar voice.
"Joannie."
LIlly said, coming face to face with a rather pretty, but scowling girl, same height as Lilly.
"Hello wimpcot and Stinky."
"Wanna take this outside?"
Lilly asked.
"Would be glad to, when are you free?"
Joannie asked, sneering, books in hand.
"everyday-"
Apart from wednesday, badminton practise."
Miley whispered to Lilly.
Lilly repeated.
"Well, see you around, Wimpcot."
Joannie said, cackling.
When Joannie left around the corner of the school hall, Lilly cracked her knuckles.
"Eugh, I hate Joannie, I even named my boogers after her!"
Miley was too busy looking at the screen.
Lilly craned her neck and saw what was happening.
"Oh! It's love love love a story of love!"
Lilly sighed, eyes distant.
"Are you at the bit where they're at the flea market, the girl grabbed the book and the boy grabbed the book, their eyes met and it was true love?"
Miley and Lilly sighed.
But suddenly, there an enormous crash.
"Wonder what that was."
Lilly and Miley said in unusion, running around the corner.
Their eyes fell apon a strange sight.
Oliver was crouching opposite Joannie, a mess of books on the floor.
Oliver was wearing his usual blue and black back pack, skateboard obviously the cause of this rucus as it lay in the corner, his helmet under one arm.
He wore a blue and yellow stripey short-sleeved shirt under his black and white pinstripe jacket and his black jeans with his white trainers.
His brown eyes wer ehidden under his brown floppy fringe.
"Uh, sorry, you dropped your poetry book."
Oliver said, not really noticing her.
"Yeah, sorry about that."
She said in a bored fashion.
Oliver and Joannie grabbed the Love Poetry book and tugged, suddenly.. Their eyes met. Green eyes on Brown eyes.
Oliver froze, as did Joannie.
Then after a few minutes, a lovey-dovey smile was replaced by the bored grimace.
Miley and Lilly noticed this.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
They screamed together, Lilly's hands over her eyes.

Miley instantly ran off with Lily. "Great, now it's
Not so smokin Oaken and Stupid Goodey.
What's UP with that." Miley said,
grabbing her books and rushing home before anyone
could stop her. She went straight to her bedroom and
screamed her head off in a pillow-case; To resolve her problems as Jackson came into the room.
"Hi Hannah screamtana." He said, Grabbing a
pillow-case and slapping it at her a few times.
"Want some Loco-hot-coco?" Robbie said, coming up.
Miley replied with a simple scream from her pillow-case.
"I guess that's a no." He said, going back downstairs,
while sipping the Loco-Hot-Coco.

Oliver sighed, but Lilly turned him, furious as Joannie walked off.
"What ARE you doing?"
She asked.
"She has the most amazing eyes doesn't she?"
Oliver said, giggling stupidly.
"Oliver, snap out of it, she's an evil, lying witch, a wart on a big monkey's butt."
Oliver blinked, rather hurt.
"Just promise me, you won't go out with her."
Oliver frowned, but sighed.
"I promise."
He mumbled.
"Spit promise?"
Oliver moaned, but spat on his hand, as did Lilly. They shook hands.
Suddenly, Joannie passed by, dazed as she stared up at Oliver.
"Wanna go out some time?"
She dazedly asked.
"Yeahh.."
Oliver replied, equally sighing.
Oliver walked off with Joannie, his arm around her shoulder, her arms around his waist.
Lilly's eyes were widened threethousand times their size and she instantly got out her phone, remembering Miley running off.
She dialed Miley's mobile.
After a few minutes of waiting, Miley finally answered.
"What?"
Came the moany voice of Miley.
"It's worse than I thought. We did the spit swear.. Aaand."
"Don't tell me he broke it!"
"Yeah.. Joannie pukeanne is going out with him!"
Miley's gasp was heard.
"This must be a fix up. She's gonna hurt Oliver in some way. We gotta stop it!"
Lilly quickly said.
"But--"
"No buts, something smells evil!"
With this, LIlly hung up.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7qjojIzE8YQ&feature=related

Miley smirked.
"Don't worry. Give him the silent treatment.
Also, don;'t worry. Mike Stand won't be coming to
any more concert." Miley said, furious.
Oliver would never lie to Lily.

Oliver walked past Lilly, holding hands with Joannie, but suddenly Oliver was tripped over by Lilly's foot.
Joannie looked furious.
"Don't hurt my Big O."
She said, squaring up to LIlly.
Lilly spluttered.
"Big O?!! Girl.. He has the emotions of a girl!"
Oliver got up, looking hurt like a puppydog.
"Geez. Lilly will you cut it out?!"
"Do I hear an annoying buzzing sound?"
She said airily while Joannie stormed off.
"Look, the least you could do is pretend to like Joannie... Just because you hate her and I love her, doesn't mean you have to be mean to me too.. I thought you were my friend."
"Well.. I THOUGHT YOU WERE TOO! You broke the spit promise."
Oliver faltered.
"Well.. I'm sorry because.. I just love ehr so much and you must think about it."
He started to walk off.
But LIlly caught him by the arm.
"I'm sorry.. Miley's angry and I'm angry. Miley hates Joannie mroet han anything in the world.. I don't think she likes you anymore.. She ran off when she saw you and Joannie.. Together."
Oliver sighed, looking at the floor.
"This is the first REAL girlfriend I;ve had, can't you guys be happy for me?"
He asked as the bell went for last lesson.
He picked up his skateboard, put the helmet and skateboard in his locker and walked beside LIlly.
"You'll have to say that to Miley."
She warned him.
"Well. I'll go round' afetr school... See if I can change her mind."
He blinked, walking into Mrs. Kunkel's lesson.

Miley is still screaming her face out, while crying.
Out of all the people, even Amber and Ashley! Why Joanie?
Joanie just made life terrible for everybody else.


- Meanwhile -

"Oaken! Why are you late?" Mrs. Kunkel strictly said.
"Sorry, Mrs. Kunkel." Oliver said quickly, getting into his seat
He passed Joanie a pink-coloured note with love-hearts on.
Joanie red it and blew a kiss to Oliver.
Mrs. Kunkel saw a pink blurry thing and Joanie blow a kiss.
She was not happy.
"Ah. A Note passer. Shall I share it amoungs't the rest of us?
Shall I? Shall I?!" She said, opening it.
Joanie Blushed.
Oliver blushed.

Mrs. Kunkel coughed.

"Dear Cookie-kins. I love you very much let's make-out some time. Love Big O. " Mrs. Kunkel said, smiling.

Oliver was now as red as the sun.